"Healthy"

What does it mean to be ‘recovered’ from an eating disorder? After years of treating my body like a battle ground, I spent six months of 2011 in intensive recovery for anorexia. One of the hardest parts, by far, was defining myself without the crutch of an eating disorder. It was easy for the first few months: I was a ‘recovering’ anorexic. To the outside world, I was taking on an incredible task, and I was applauded for it. But after I gained the weight, after I was medically ‘healthy’ again, I was left without any identity at all. With 50+ pounds on me, I appeared to be recovered, but I didn't feel it.

Some people say that you never completely recover from an eating disorder. I’d like to not believe that, but I also know that recovery is a long and daunting road. After a full year of being at a ‘healthy’ weight, I know I still have a lot more work to do (I guess that makes me human). 

So I am starting this blog to document the ways I work to keep myself healthy, both physically and emotionally. It’s a way to hold myself accountable, and to hopefully reach anyone who is facing similar challenges.